Tuesday, June 9, 2009

Our kitchen is doomed.

Really. It's true. With the messes and accidents that happen in our kitchen, you would think we had 4 year old quadruplet boys.

The curse started (oddly enough) after we had been cleaning out the huge cupboard the serves as a pantry. My parents didn't move hardly any of the food out of it when they moved. So one night, Doug and I spent a couple hours taking everything out that we wouldn't use and hauled boxes and boxes of their food downstairs. We completely cleaned the inside of this huge cupboard and put all of our stuff back in.
Near the end, I got a can of Dr. Pepper out of the fridge, opened it, and had drank a little out of it. We thought we were done but spotted a jar of spaghetti sauce on the counter that we had forgotten to put away. Doug grabbed it and walked over to put it away. I had my Dr. Pepper in my hand, and as he reached to put the sauce away, he hit my hand (or the can) with the bottle, and my can of Dr. Pepper fell to the floor. Only, instead of just spilling, something horrible happened. It hit the ground and fell on its side, and suddenly started spinning so fast that it just looked like a purpleish red circle. And while it was spinning, it was OF COURSE spraying our entire kitchen, wall to wall, with Dr. Pepper.
I was soaked past my knees, Doug was soaked too, the wall closest to the scene was dripping from about 3 or 4 feet high down. The cupboard we had just spent 2 hours cleaning was dripping Dr. Pepper. Mind you, this cupboard is about 3 feet deep and a couple feet from the ground, and the back wall of it was dripping too. The food we had put inside now had brown polka dots. The nearest counter had gotten it to and my stovetop was even covered. Our other cupboards were dripping. Don't forget the floor had a puddle near the can, and sprays across the room....and we hadn't bought a mop yet AND it was around 11 at night. This Dr. Pepper not only had an incredible range, but it also got clear high up on things.
Now, I wish I had a picture of the carnage to show you. But at the time, I was so mad that it wasn't funny. I stood in the same spot, my legs dripping, speechless, just staring for I don't even know how long. Doug at one point said, "It's funny." and I snapped back, "No it's not!" I finally moved and we started to clean up. I was trying not to cry and I asked him to feed the animals while I cleaned. He walked away and I started to cry. Now it's HILARIOUS, but trust me, it wasn't then!

And that's how the curse started.

Next, (only a week or so later) I was reaching into the fridge for something, and knocked out a can of leftover pineapple. I yelled in frustration and stomped back to the bedroom to tell Doug, "Come look what I just did." He said, "Did you spill something?" And I said, "Just come look." He came out and we both had some good laughs about it. This time, I took a picture.

And last, (at least to this point), I was cooking dinner and got thirsty. I got out a can of my newfound friend Antioxidant Cherry 7-Up. I was browning hamburger to make Tory's tater tot casserole. I usually get low enough fat content hamburger that I don't have to drain it, but for some reason, it was fatty enough this time that I had to drain it. I tried draining into a little can and was struggling, so I decided to just tilt the pan and spoon it out. I had the pan tilted so the fat was near one edge and I didn't want to set it flat again while I grabbed a spoon.
I looked around for something I could set the pan handle on to keep it tilted enough. Viola! I saw my can of 7-Up on the counter right next to the stove and it was the perfect height. Now I'm sure you can guess what happened next, and sadly enough I knew it was a bad idea but I still did it. So I set the handle on the can. Surprisingly enough it didn't knock it over immediatley, but while I was spooning grease out something happened and the can tipped over. It was just far enough from the edge of the counter that when it tipped, the pop ran down the cupboards before hitting the ground. Yuk.

Let me repeat, our kitchen is doomed. I'm sure there will be more funny stories to come, stay tuned!